Shat
terd
Men
The
hidden half of domestic violence
How
to have eternal life
Last
week, my wife and I watched a TV program called "Gray's
Anatomy" The hospital was about to perform a facial transplant
on someone whose face had been destroyed in an accident. He had
recovered from the accident as far as the initial trauma but now it would be
possible to do the reconstructive surgery needed to restore his face.
Meanwhile, he had stayed home and did not leave it due to his looks. He
made a lot of friends on the Internet but no one knew what he looked like.
As it came time for the surgery, one of the doctors did find some of his
closest friends from the Internet and several of them came to give him
support. At first he was very upset and told them to go away.
He told them that no one wanted to see his ugly face. One of these
friends then said..."do not call my friend ugly" and she leaned over
and gave him a kiss on what of his cheek that remained. The actor did a
very good job at showing by his eyes how he would have felt that there
were those that were not repulsed at what they saw, nor do I think anyone
could have done anything more supportive then what his friend did.
(Oh, the surgery was a success of course) More important, he found that
true friends were not concerned with how he looked.
There
are many ways we may feel "unwanted" One of the things I
remember most about school was gym class. I was never
good at any sports so I was always the last to be called when the team
captains were choosing the teams. Most of us who were always last, of
course felt "unwanted" Since I did not really like
sports, this did not bother me as much as it may have bothered some
others. Of course, not being good at sports did carry into the time I
spent in the Army. When I was in basic training and we were doing the
live hand grenade thing, the sergeant felt the safest place to be when it was
my turn, would be to stand in the target area. (I was not allowed to
throw a live grenade) I have no problem with this as it was one of the
reasons I became a medic and later why I have the back ground I need to have
started a ministry called Shattered Men.
Much
more important are those who have felt unwanted at home. Many of you were
told they were "accidents" and told you should never have been born.
Some of you reading this were told you were the wrong gender and as
a result, you may have grown up not like being the gender you are.
Every time
there was a problem at home or anywhere else, you may have been told it was
your fault. One of the most common things heard was "look what you
made me do" Instead of the cowboy song, "where seldom is heard
a discouraging word" you never heard an encouraging word.
If we
thought things could not get any worse, it did as we were told that even GOD
could not love us.
Many
of you here would be afraid to meet the friends you have met on the Internet
in person because you are afraid they would reject you if they saw how you
looked.
My
precious friend, if this is hitting close to home....please realize that all
of these things you were told is a load of HOG WASH! Look what GOD
has said in Psalms 139 about YOU my friend
13For
thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother's womb.
14I
will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy
works; and that my soul knoweth right well.
15My
substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in secret, and curiously
wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
16Thine
eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book all my members
were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none
of them.
17How
precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum of them!
18If
I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am
still with thee.
Look
at verse 17 again....How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how
great is the sum of them!
My
friend, GOD does not only WANT you....HE LOVES YOU! This is
not the type of love
you
may be used to. You see, often abuse is performed as the abuser was
saying they loved us and were doing it for our own good. Everything
that has value has been counterfeited from money, to art work and pottery.
Real love does have real value so it is not surprising that it too has
been counterfeited but love does not seek its own. It gives
without demanding or even expecting anything in return.
There
was a stray cat around our house which we noticed several years ago.
It would not let anyone get near it but we did leave food out for it.
This cat was even cautions about that for a long time. Then
slowly, it learned to trust us. It came near us at
times, and then it actually let us touch it. Still it would
not even come into the garage although the 16 foot wide door was wide open.
Later we could even pick it up but we could not hold it for more then a
few seconds. At the beginning of this winter, it let
us take it into the house…and found out that it was warm. Now
it does not want to leave the house and it follows me wherever I go and wants
to be held or just to sleep next to us wherever we are. We
did not expect this when we first started feeding it. We
fed this cat because it needed food. Real love is just like
this. It gives without expecting anything in return but
when we realize we ARE loved for who we are and not for what we can do, we
will have much the same reaction as this cat above.
You
know, I was a lot like this cat. I was straying far away
from safety when someone started caring for me. He called
me by name and comforted me, never expecting anything in return. His
name is Jesus.
Looking
back, some of the most affectionate pets I have had were the strays.
When I look around, some of the people I know that make it most evident
that they love the Lord with all of their being…were just like the woman
with the alabaster box because they were the outcast of society. They
were the last to be chosen in any event. Many had an abusive
childhood and had felt the sting of being unwanted! Just as
this stay cat I have talked about loves to be near me, I too love to be near
my LORD. I see it as a picture of my relationship with the
one who loves me most…the creator of everything we see. Just
as I do not need this cat but I want it and I love to see its reaction, to see
it wanting to be near me when at one time it would never allow me to touch it,
I know that at one time, I did not want GOD near me. Now I
know I would not want to live without HIM! I was hungry,
and He gave me bread for my soul. I was thirsty, and He gave living water, He
is my shelter in the storms of life. He is my shield and
strong defender. He gave me peace and joy and reassurance
that I will never be left standing alone as others are chosen before me.
He knows me by name and He has written my name in a very special book
called the Book of Life and that means He will never ever abandon me.
Many
of you were never called by your name as you were called by everything but
your name but if you listen closely, GOD is calling you by your name....right
now! HE is saying "How precious also are My thoughts of YOU!"
All you need to do is to reach out to HIM…and HE will come all the
way to where you are and then you too will know…you are…WANTED!
This is how!
The
First Step to Better Relationship
http://www.shatterdmen.com/first_step.htm
(please click above to vote for
this site)
JUNE
is Domestic Violence Against Men Awareness Month