terdShat
terd
Men
The hidden half of domestic violence
How
Does It FEEL???
This
morning, a father that has not been able to see his children while knowing that
they are living with an abuser posted a message in Shattered Men.
Unfortunately, this is not unusual. I have personally seen hundreds of
messages just like this. In reality, there are hundreds of thousands of fathers
and thousands of mothers just like this. It
even happened to my own nephew as he found that his daughter was murdered by a
know child molester his ex had living with her.
You can read about that here:
http://www.shatterdmen.com/HIGH%20Cost.htm
As
I was reading the message from this father this morning, I wanted to find some
why to give you a picture of what it is like for these loving fathers and
mothers we described above. I want
you to be able to feel what they must be feeling.
Just
think for a moment. You are a firefighter and the alarm goes off. You get your
turnout gear on as quickly possible as the garage doors are opening and the
engine is revving up. In only a moment, the truck is on its way, siren
screaming...to alert everyone to get out of the way...someone needs help. As you
move down the crowed streets, some cars pull over to the side to let you pass
but others just keep on going and you think: “Don’t’ they care?”
Perhaps they are simply oblivious to what is going on around them, like
the proverbial ostrich with its head in the sand.
http://www.shatterdmen.com/Head%20in%20Sand.htm
You
are a few blocks away and you can see smoke filling the sky. You know it is a
working fire, not just another false alarm. The truck stops and you can see
flames coming out of several windows. Just then your eyes catch a glimpse of
something in another window and your heart stops.... you see several children
screaming for help. They cannot get out because the window has burglar bars on
it. You also realize that very room is on fire but.... You cannot get in either
because the same bars that were intended to protect them now entrap them.
You
think of your own kids now safe at home sleeping in their beds as the screams
stop.... and you know why...
Even if you can manage to pull these bars off and rescue these precious
children, they will often be scared for life as they remember the event or
worse...they have to deal with damaged lungs and scars from smoke and
burns.
The same bars that were intended to protect them.... Child Protective
Services.... now ENTRAPS them. They get loving fathers and sometimes mothers
that will protect them out of the home so those that will harm then can often
move in. I have personally met one
mother and father that have lost ten children to this system. I know they were
not abusive to their children
Their
story is here:
http://
Enter
the family court system which compounds it because if it were as the picture
above, they would insist the burglar alarms be installed...to protect the
children.
Let me add to this picture a little more. After the fire is out the Fire
Inspector may well find that the children were left alone or that the fire was
started by an adult’s carelessness or.... as does happen once in a
while...willfully set. Still many
times in the situation our fathers face, nothing will be done.
My friend that is how I feel so often when listening to our people. More
important...this is how our dads feel when their children are turned over to
those whom they know are their abusers
Often all I can do is listen...to let our hurting men and women know that
someone does care. Someone does understand how they feel and that although we
may not be able to "do" anything, we can point to ONE who can comfort
them...and ONE who will eventually render justice.
As
a pastor and as the Director of Shattered Men it is my earnest prayer that we
can put feet to our prayers God
will send even more here that can help us DO something to get these bars off the
windows so we can rescue our children.
My
friend, if you are one of these fathers and you have raised the white flag of
surrender and have given up, may I suggest a better course of
action…become….A
Formidable Enemy
http://www.shatterdmen.com/Enemy.htm
In closing this I would also like to
suggest that there may be another reason that there is so much injustice to our
fathers…a much more sinister reason a hidden agenda which you can read here:
http://www.shatterdmen.com/Bitter.htm
Pastor Kenneth Deemer
Director Shattered Men
P.O. BOX 166
MARION INDIANA 46952-0166
JUNE is Domestic Violence Against Men Awareness Month
Web site: http://www.shatterdmen.com
Interactive Group: http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/Shatteredmen/
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JUNE is Domestic Violence Against Men Awareness Month